13/10/09 ( WEEK SEVEN: RETIREMENT)
To day is my father’s death anniversary. He passed away 3years ago after a short illness. I was with him in India when it happened. Even though we all knew it was inevitable, the grief and sadness were immense.
Before this experience I always felt that death of a near one will make one so distort that one would not be able to function efficiently in a worldly sense at least in the first few weeks. Naively I used to think that people who behaved so capably during the funerals were not really close to the deceased. Actually the rituals and funeral arrangements dampened the shock and brought us out of the paralytic stupor. It also brought our extended family closer.
When father was alive I never thought about my own death. My life seemed somehow protected and insured by my father’s longevity. Does every eldest sibling feel like this, I wonder.
It is good that the requirements of living are so much that one dose not have much time to ponder on death, particularly one’s own. I am immortal till I die!
Being over 60 has its benefits too, such as free insulation of the house. While I am writing this the walls are being drilled for cavity wall insulation. It is worse that being in a dentist’s chair. I have to get out of the study.
See you soon.
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